Love is a drug I’m addicted to

Hey guys due to it being it the holidays I apologise for not updating my blog frequently since I didn’t really do much except for shopping, hanging out with my friends and watching drama and movies.

There is something I need to get off my chest and that is how I’m so hung up over the idea of getting a boyfriend. All the romance dramas I’ve watched, all the love songs I’ve been listening to and my guy radar has been high too is just driving me NUTS, LOCO, YOOHOOO. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHH as I’m writing this I realise how much of a trivial thing it is I just need to start dating around simple #NOT there must be chemistry involved plus I’m not as popular unlike my other girlfriends with guys. I am an introverted extrovert thus I appear reserved around others but I actually have a great burst of energy within but it also depends on my surroundings too. Hence I appear as this cold, low confidence, unattractive woman. No guy has made me face my true side although I do not really need a guy to help me in that area but the reason why I hid my extroverted nature was because of one guy.

The first contributing fact to my disturbed mind is in order to pass time at home I usually watch drama or anime but the only ones that are popular or interesting to me is typically the romance genre. Plus I have watched 7 dramas consecutively about a girl falling in love with a rich guy, 6/7 of the guys are in the CEO position. LIKE COME ON this is so unrealistic but somehow I’m still engaged in it. Haisss its not about the extent of wealth they possess despite that something about the exuding confidence that they have the power to protect you attracts me. Plus all guys look good in a suit in my opinion (EYECANDY FOR DAYS) However, sometimes I reflect on my life on those really cheesy scenes and think if only that was me, as if that could manifest into reality, why do I have such a boring love life haizzzzz.

The second contributing fact is my active guy radar. It’s a name I have given to describe me spotting out hot guys in the public constantly. WTH why don’t I just ask for their number like what year is this 1995, NO. BUT STILL I’M AFRAID OF THE STARES won’t ppl judge me for being desperate ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Third contributing fact is the songs I’ve been listening to. Sure y0u can say I have a control of this but its not my fault my brain has a craving for love songs it just lifts up my mood but at the same time it dampens it, makes sense ????

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